Decision been made. It is final and it hurts. Never been this pain before. She's my cousin sister more to my own sister as she been staying with us since 3 days on this world.

I taught her how to walk, feed her, put her to sleep, play with her, send her to school. Most of the things i was there for her. From a cute little baby to a teenager. From good to bad. From bad to worse. We did anything to guide her to the path untill a point that we're helpless. She just wouldnt listen anymore. We decided to let her go. To a better environment, leave everything here. Start a new life back to her dad's place.

I left my work earlier to send her there. I thought i will be able to hold my tears but once we about to leave she started to cry. I left from the scene and closed the door to be outside but once she opened the door i couldnt stand it anymore, i burst into tears and hugged her. It was hard for us and her. We been living together for 16 years as a family. We barely spend time together before we send her go.

At night, the phone finally ranged. Is her. Is her crying voice that i recognized earlier. She never been this sad before. I talked to her for a while to make go to bed. Then i send her a sms as i know that i will burst into tears again if i talk longer to her.

"I want to go back as soon as possible, i miss all of u so much, i am much happier there with u all than staying here. Good night too, take care, koko ;("

Is been 6 days. I still can't get used to it. The way i switch off the lights when she bathing, the way i tickle her, the way she poke tissue to my nose. Whenever im back from work, shes not there to open the door for me. The first thing that i will ask my parents when im baxk is where is her but now i know shes not here anymore.

I keep thinking of her. Misses her. Worrying her. Calling her to listen to her voice cure my heartache.

When will the time that we will see you again?